Remembering with colour, love, and celebration

Every year, as October fades into November and the veil between the worlds is said to grow thin, millions of people in Mexico and beyond prepare for one of the most beautiful and heartfelt traditions in the world: El Día de los Muertos, or The Day of the Dead. Far from being a sombre or morbid occasion, it’s a vibrant, colourful, and love-filled celebration of life, memory, and connection with those who have passed away.

When is the Day of the Dead?

The Day of the Dead is not just a single day but a period of observance that spans 1st and 2nd November, coinciding with All Saints’ Day and All Souls’ Day in the Catholic calendar.

• 31st October - All Hallows’ Eve (Día de las Brujas):
  Preparations begin on this evening as families start to clean and decorate their homes and create altars, or ofrendas, ready to welcome back the spirits of their loved ones.

• 1st November - Día de los Angelitos (Day of the Little Angels):
  This day is dedicated to remembering children who have died. Families place toys, sweets, and small gifts on the altar, along with candles to guide the spirits of these young souls home.

• 2nd November - Día de los Muertos (Day of the Dead):
  The main day of celebration focuses on honouring deceased adults. It is believed that the souls of the departed return to visit their families during this time, and every effort is made to make them feel welcome.

What happens during the celebrations?

In Mexico, preparations for the Day of the Dead begin weeks in advance. Markets brim with brightly coloured marigolds, sugar skulls, and pan de muerto (bread of the dead). Families tidy the graves of their loved ones, cleaning and adorning them with flowers, candles, and photographs.

At home, altars (ofrendas) are the heart of the celebration. Each one is a work of art and love - a carefully curated space to invite the spirits back into the family fold. The altar usually contains:

• Photographs of loved ones who have passed.

• Candles, representing hope and remembrance.

• Cempasúchil (marigolds), whose bright orange petals symbolise the fragility of life and are believed to guide spirits with their scent and colour.

• Favourite foods and drinks of the departed, so they can enjoy them once more.

• Incense, particularly copal, to cleanse the space and invite positive energy.

• Personal mementos, from letters to cherished belongings, that connect the living to the dead.

These offerings are not made in grief but in joy - a recognition that death is a natural part of life’s cycle and that love does not end when a heartbeat does. Families gather to share stories, cook traditional foods, and spend time together in laughter and warmth.

In many towns and cities, processions fill the streets with colour and music. People paint their faces as calaveras (skulls), dress in ornate costumes, and carry candles or flowers to cemeteries where they spend the evening among the graves, singing, talking, and remembering those who have gone before.

The symbolism behind the traditions

Every element of the Day of the Dead carries meaning. The skull, often seen as a universal symbol of death, takes on a completely different role here. Painted with bright colours and joyful designs, the calavera becomes a reminder that death should not be feared - it is simply another step in the journey.

The marigold, or flower of the dead, is another powerful symbol. Its fiery orange hue represents the sun and the cycle of life, and its petals are often scattered in trails leading from the altar to the doorway to help guide spirits home.

Even the food tells a story. Pan de muerto is sweet, soft, and round, often decorated with bone-shaped dough and sprinkled with sugar, symbolising the circle of life and the sweetness of memory.

A time to reconnect

The Day of the Dead is not about mourning but connection. It’s a time to reflect, to remember, and to celebrate the people who shaped our lives. It reminds us that grief can be met with gratitude and that remembrance can be joyful as well as tender.

In Mexico, families don’t hide away their grief; they transform it into art, song, and ritual. They teach their children to honour their ancestors not with silence, but with celebration. This collective remembrance weaves generations together - the living and the dead sharing space, stories, and spirit.

How we remember in the UK

In the UK, our approach to death and remembrance is often quieter and more reserved. We tend to associate grief with solemnity, and public expressions of remembrance are usually formal - such as Remembrance Sunday or All Souls’ services in churches.

While these are meaningful, they rarely capture the vibrancy of life that the Day of the Dead embodies. We might visit a grave, light a candle, or keep mementos at home, but we don’t often gather as families or communities to share stories, laugh, and celebrate the personalities of those we’ve lost.

Yet, there is much we could learn from the spirit of El Día de los Muertos.

How we can create our own tradition

Imagine setting aside a day each year to celebrate the lives of those who’ve passed - a day filled with warmth, memory, and connection. We could adapt elements of the Day of the Dead to suit our own culture and climate, while keeping its essence of remembrance through love.

Here are some gentle ways we could make it our own:

• Create a family altar: Use photos, candles, flowers, and items that remind you of your loved ones. Include their favourite foods or drinks and take a moment to share a story about them.

• Host a remembrance meal: Gather friends and family to cook dishes that hold meaning. Toast to those no longer with us, share memories, and keep their presence alive through conversation.

• Visit places that mattered to them: A walk along a favourite beach, a visit to their garden, or a quiet moment in a park they loved can become part of the ritual.

• Use nature’s symbols: Since marigolds don’t bloom in our climate in late autumn, we could use local flowers such as chrysanthemums or heather - both symbols of remembrance.

• Get creative: Paint stones, light lanterns, write letters, or craft memory jars - anything that celebrates who they were and how they live on through you.

Death will always carry sadness, but remembrance can also hold beauty, laughter, and light. The Day of the Dead reminds us that our loved ones never truly leave us - their essence lingers in the stories we tell, the values we uphold, and the love that continues to shape our lives.

By borrowing from the spirit of this Mexican tradition, we can begin to view remembrance not as an ending but as an ongoing relationship. A chance, once a year, to pause, give thanks, and fill our hearts not with sorrow, but with celebration.